To be or not to be

I was vegetarian for years. Die hard vegetarian, like peta protest and president of the university animal activism club vegetarian. All rather ironic since you really cannot be all that die hard unless you go vegan right. Kinda hyprocritical lol.

Anywho I have been toying with the idea of going back to vegetarianism for a few years now. I go back and forth for a variety of reasons. I question if there is any since in it when I have no desire to go vegan and am a fan of all things  öko including animal products such as leather and wool. At the same time of course I realize there are many other positive aspects in a vegetarian diet to consider.

At the end of the day meat freaks me out. Seems silly to consume something you can only eat when you fully desensitize yourself to what it really is. That and I love me some chicken. It was always my weakness. I have toyed with the idea of just eliminating red meat and leaving the occasional chicken, though that leaves me feeling like a fakatarian haha.

I suppose I will just start introducing more vegetarian meals and reducing meat baised meals and go from there. We will never be the vegetarian or vegan family, besides the fact that my husband would never fully go vegetarian he is not comfortable raising vegetarian kids and that is ok even if I do decide to go full on meat free I was vegetarian with a meat eating partner for years and just altered dishes to accomidate myself. Some thinsg seem easier then others. I found a variety of things between aldi and dm to replace meats in my diet, sure too if I venture into the big city for the reform house I would find even more.

I am not sure where the hesitation stems from. Fear of change or having to make adaptations which really should not be all that bothersome as I already want to redo our diet and focus more on real whole foods and less fertig produkte. I just sit on the fence, or rather edge of the pond with my toes dangling in the water yet afraid to jump in. So silly considering I already did it what 10 years and thats like a third of my life meat free. I was just so dependent on the ease of it in the us, especially portland. Veggies options everywhich way you turn.

I wonder if I would feel better, physically I mean by altering my diet. I dunno. But I am tired of siting and wondering...